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hi your ugly

Sooo…. The internet can be a really ugly place, can’t it?

I posted a video on Facebook the other day of some hairstyles. They were messy but I still thought they were cute and I got quite a few comments telling me how they were a “sloppy hot mess” and “WTF I wake up with better hair!”

A while back I got a comment on my YouTube channel that said:

“hi your ugly”

Just like that – bad grammar and all. Now I don’t know if that comment was really a person or what, but it made me laugh. First of all, it’s YOU’RE ugly. Second of all, even if you thought I was ugly, why do you feel the need to say it? I posted it on Facebook so that you could all have a good laugh too and everyone was so kind in offering support and encouragement.

And you guys, YOU’RE awesome. Thank you. I do want to talk a little bit about the comment though.

Putting yourself out there on social media can be hard. People have opinions and tucked safely away behind a computer screen it feels so easy to share those opinions and not have any consequences as to how they’re received. And that’s not right, people should use self control and be considerate of other people’s feelings.

But there is a flip side to that. We have become a generation of easily offended people. Different parenting styles, political views, lifestyles and we’re all offended when someone shares an opinion or how they feel.

See, the reason that comment didn’t offend me one single bit was because my worth isn’t found in other people’s comments about me. I am not ugly and I know that. I don’t need a commentator to validate my beauty or to demean me. I am okay with the way that I look and nothing anyone says — especially someone I don’t know from Adam — says will change that. And you know what, if someone truly thinks I am ugly, I am okay with that too. I am not everyone’s cup of tea, and not everyone will like me and the way I look. That’s not my goal in life. I am a daughter of the King and loved and chosen by Him first and foremost. And I’ve already got a husband who loves me so I’m not on the look out for other men or people in general to find me attractive.

It’s a sad world we live in that for one people can feel so free to share their negative strong opinions online. Because what if I was an insecure young girl? Those comments could have cut a lot deeper. You/we don’t know what’s going on behind the computer screen and negative comments could be more hurtful than we think.

Can we find a happy medium? Because while most of the negative comments were just rude, there was at least a couple that said something about not liking the styles but they said it in a nice, respectful way that I actually appreciated them. I could respond in a good way and actually have a little conversation about it. That is how it’s done!

Also, just a thought, if you’re scrolling through Facebook and there’s a video or post that you just think is stupid, I have an idea… just keep scrolling. You may think it’s ridiculous but that person might have worked hard on it and taking the time to read/watch & comment negatively is just not necessary. It’s a free platform, you have the freedom to not like what’s being put out there. I guess I just don’t understand the need to tell everyone that you don’t like it.

But I can’t control other people, I can only control myself and I want to encourage you all today as well. Let’s be okay. Let’s be secure. Let’s be confident in the way God made us. Let’s be okay with the imperfections that we can’t fix and work on the ones that we can. Let’s teach our sons and daughters to love each other and to love themselves. Let’s start a new generation of people who are confident and secure but equally loving and encouraging to others.

You are beautiful. You are enough. You are worth it.

19 Responses to hi your ugly

  1. Aunt Sherry January 20, 2016 at 12:43 pm #

    Well said Natalia!!! And anyone who says you’re ugly is just jealous, period. I happen to think you are beautiful..

    • Natalia January 21, 2016 at 4:03 pm #

      Thank you! It couldn’t be because you’re my aunt, could it? 😉 I still appreciate the love and support!

      • Susan January 22, 2016 at 7:16 am #

        Thank you for all the work you put into your site. It is interesting and fun to be introduced to new ideas and perspectives. Keep being you…. God made you an original not to be a carbon copy. Life is always one big opportunity to grow.

        • Natalia January 26, 2016 at 6:32 am #

          Very very true, thank you!! I will press on! 🙂

  2. Olivia January 20, 2016 at 1:23 pm #

    Thank you for these poignant words of encouragement. And, for what its worth, you couldn’t be less ugly! Also, I enjoyed your last hairstyles post.

    • Natalia January 21, 2016 at 4:02 pm #

      Thanks! You’re kind and I appreciate it now more than ever 😉

  3. Katie January 20, 2016 at 8:58 pm #

    YOU’RE awesome For reals – I love these words you wrote.

    • Natalia January 21, 2016 at 4:02 pm #

      Thank you lady! Love you!

  4. Katherine C. January 21, 2016 at 11:16 am #

    I agree 100%. Unfortunately, technology (with the emphasis on the internet) has changed people (not in the best way) and how we treat each other. We have no way of controlling people, but we have full control on how we react to their reaction. It’s an age of personal responsibility and a lot of people are slacking. Happy that you were able to shrug it off! <3

    • Natalia January 21, 2016 at 4:01 pm #

      Thank you! I completely agree, the personal responsibility is lacking. I hope to teach my kids to be kind in all forms, bot just to people’s faces. I also hope to regulate their interaction on the computer and internet and hope to teach them how to handle it properly. But then my kids are young. These are adults. I think most of them should know better! lol

      • Katherine C. January 21, 2016 at 5:08 pm #

        They definitely should!!! 🙂

  5. Bek @ just for daisy January 22, 2016 at 3:55 am #

    Beautiful words 🙂

  6. Amanda | This Blissful Homelife January 24, 2016 at 7:39 pm #

    Great words! I think people really need to ask themselves, “If I were face to face with this person, would I even dare to say this?” I think the internet would be a much friendlier place if they did. And as for the comment itself, it’s totally bogus! 🙂

    • Natalia January 26, 2016 at 6:28 am #

      I completely agree! People wouldn’t say half the stuff they say online!

  7. Diane January 26, 2016 at 3:02 am #

    Hi there, I posted this on your FB page but wanted to write here too:

    People are so strange. If I come across a video or style that I just don’t care for, I move on. If I took the time to leave a critical comment on every video or post I didn’t care for or that didn’t work for me, I’d never have time to do anything else. I don’t get why people waste time on the silliest things.

    But about your video, I LOVE IT. I love most of your videos although when I try to do cool styles, I have about 1/10th of your talent. Mine don’t look anywhere near as good as yours. So keep on doing what you do. The vast majority of us appreciate your efforts and find inspiration in your tutorials (even if our own efforts fall way short). xx

    • Natalia January 26, 2016 at 6:35 am #

      Thank you so much for your kind words! Because even though mean comments don’t really get me down too much, it’s still nice to know that the effort I put into these things is appreciated. I’m not in it for some kind of popularity contest, I really just want to put something helpful out there for women! It’s good to know it’s somewhat appreciated!! 🙂

  8. Katy January 26, 2016 at 6:34 pm #

    So beautifully written! It’s a shame that people take the time out of their day and put so much focus into spreading negativity. Keep up the great work with blogging/vlogging and being kind/confident/worth! <3

  9. Michelle January 27, 2016 at 8:39 am #

    Well said! And… you are GORGEOUS!

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