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Being Gracious

I made it, you guys, I made it. I traveled about 23 hours with my two kids on three airplanes across the globe. And we all survived.

I don’t want to bore you with all my details of my flight but there were a few that got me thinking.

On our second flight which was an 8-1/2 hour transatlantic flight, the flight attendants were the rudest I have ever come across. And that’s saying something. I think only 2 of them smiled. The others, I am not exaggerating, didn’t crack a smile the entire trip. It was unbelievable. But that might be another story for another time.

We had a row to ourselves and it went Tae, Eli, me. When the attendant came on Tae’s side to offer him a drink, he was watching a movie with big headphones on.  I tapped his shoulder so he wouldn’t be rude to the lady to let him know she was there. She asked if he wanted water and I said no thank you. Not that she needs to know my reasons for not giving my kids water, but they had already served quite a bit of water and I didn’t want him to drink too much, fall asleep and potentially have an accident. Tae didn’t hear me say no thank you and said yes. She looked at me like I was an overbearing mother and handed him the water anyway. Already a little bit frustrated, I just gave in, because hello – I have about 12 more hours to travel, I just want things to be easy. So I reached over and pulled his tray down. She laughed a pity laugh and said “I think he’s old enough to do that on his own.” She gave him his water and walked off.

Oh.My.Gosh. I was so mad. I was fuming. I felt like I needed to explain. We had already been traveling for a long time. I didn’t want to deal with an accident, I’m not trying to deprive my kid. I helped him with the tray because he was entranced in his movie. He had already stopped and asked politely and said please and thank you, I was just making it easy. We had a lot more travel in front of us and it was worth it. Plus, who cares how old my son is and can do it himself, I did it! What’s the big freakin’ deal? That’s besides the fact that my son is 6 but seriously could pass for a 9-year-old!

I don’t have to explain myself to this lady. It is not her business to know my travel plans or how I deal with my kids. I don’t baby my children, but even if I did, it’s my business to baby them, not some random flight attendant’s that I’ve never met before.

Be Kind, everyone is fighting a hard battle

I just wanted to share this story because, even though I was upset about the situation, I know that I’ve done that sort of thing before. Not out loud, but maybe in my head. Silently judged other people’s children when they’re acting up. Quietly judging a mother’s choice to just buy the toy instead of deal with a tantrum.

Besides that fact that it’s just not our business at all how other people parent, we should be understanding that parenting is stinkin’ hard. We all need grace. Nobody’s got it figured out. We’re all doing our best, messing up, and then trying our best again. There’s also so much that goes into behind the scenes that a family is dealing with, it’s not our place to judge – even silently. I think as moms we feel a little better about the job we’re doing if we think we’re doing it better than the next girl. But I think this mom-world would be so much better if instead we all just loved and supported and encouraged each other. Even the random mom at the airport who’s about to break into tears, or the mom at the grocery store trying to avoid a tantrum, or the family at the park having a hard time corralling their kid. Yes, especially them. You don’t know what battles they are fighting.

I found this on Pinterest with no source, but I loved it and wanted to share. It’s a good one to take with you for the day!

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10 Responses to Being Gracious

  1. christina January 14, 2014 at 6:41 am #

    wow, I would be fuming as well! I usually give people the benefit of the doubt, but there’s not much to doubt here, she was just being lame. encouraging that you chose to turn it around into a great post =)

    • Natalia January 22, 2014 at 9:37 am #

      Yes, I try to too because attitude is half the battle when traveling especially! But they were so rude the entire time and that was just a little much. But it’s not like we have much choice when we fly, you just chose the cheapest one and most of the time they are all bad!

  2. Agi January 14, 2014 at 9:35 am #

    Beautiful post. Yes you should totally keep what you said in mind, but it wouldn’t have killed the flight attendants to be a bit nicer. I actually copied the images and pasted it onto my facebook page.I know i’ve been trying to treat people with kindness, even those that really don’t deserve it, because being a bitch isn’t going to help the situation. There’s the old saying “Kill them with kindness!!” That’s my new motto.

    Also congrats on surviving the long flights with your kids.

    Agi:)

    vodkainfusedlemonade.com

    • Natalia January 22, 2014 at 9:36 am #

      Thank you! Yes, I was really shocked at how bad they were. I mean, it is their job. And I’m sorry if they don’t like it, but they are still getting paid to be there. It was super awful. I was trying so hard to be nice. Anyway, it’s over and I’m glad we made it!

  3. Autumn January 14, 2014 at 11:41 am #

    Yes and Amen! And so glad you made it! 🙂

    • Natalia January 22, 2014 at 9:35 am #

      Thank you! Me too! 🙂

  4. The Domestic Fringe January 14, 2014 at 7:04 pm #

    “Besides that fact that it’s just not our business at all how other people parent, we should be understanding that parenting is stinkin’ hard. We all need grace. Nobody’s got it figured out. We’re all doing our best, messing up, and then trying our best again.” Amen sister.

    Sorry you had such a bad experience. That was terrible. Thanks for sharing and turning this into something positive. It’s a good reminder for us all.
    ~FringeGirl

    • Natalia January 22, 2014 at 9:34 am #

      Thank you! It was super annoying, but thankfully I was able to calm down before I freaked out. I didn’t end up saying anything to her except “I got this, thank you.” But I am learning to be graceful in that everyone else is making mistakes and they are allowed to, just like I am. We’re all just trying to figure this out!

  5. Deanna January 16, 2014 at 11:46 am #

    Thank you! I really needed that today. I have been feelign guilty all day becuase I was short with my girls today and even washed my back tacking 9 year olds mouth out with soap. If someone would’ve side eyed me the wrong way I may have flipped. It’s nice to have the refreshing reminder us moms are not alone in this battle.

    • Natalia January 22, 2014 at 9:31 am #

      Yes, I know! It’s stinkin’ hard being a momma! That’s why I feel like we all need to support each other. We’re all just trying to do our best! I’m sure you’re doing great, hang in there!

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